Acceptance is still far away! By now I am over the denial and isolation stage, anger never really showed up but currently, I am elbow deep in the bargaining process! I expect depression to start any minute. Though cake and the bottle of wine I am going to buy but not share will probably help! Please don’t burst my bubble – I am desperate here!
But in all seriousness, when have I become such an old cow? My self-concept and reality seem to drift apart more and more every year! It’s like the continental drift, slowly but consistently.
Last year I posted a witty little list (ha I wish) of 32 things I had learned in my 32nd year of life. And because I still find that a funny concept I am doing the same this year. Look how creative I am!
And without further ado, let me enlighten you!
1. A coffee to go should always be consumed with a straw.
2. When you don’t know how to do something, you can always learn it!
3. I am not designed to be a pirate and I get really bad drunken sailor syndrome! And that’s way less fun than it sounds!
4. Most of the fun things in life are actually bad for you whereas the things that are good for you are bloody hard work. Let’s take a moment to admire the irony!
5. When you’re over 6 ft. don’t try to change your shirt while standing under a running fan. My husband and I still cry with laughter when we think of this incident!
6. Accepting help is okay and it doesn’t make you a weak person!
7. And the point when you have to overcome the fear of asking for help is definitely the one when you’re swimming in the ocean and can’t climb in a dinghy by yourself!
8. If you’re not ready to put up with *insert unwanted chore here* just don’t do it. The dirt will still be there for you the next day!
9. I have an obsessive personality. It’s a blessing and a curse!
10. Because I have only two modes: utterly obsessed or completely indifferent!
11. Just because you’re good at something doesn’t mean you have to do it!
12. I really like raw tuna.
13. In fact, I like a lot of things I always shied away from even trying.
14. When you’re working to a deadline never open Netflix or Youtube! Never!
15. The hardest part of driving on ‘the wrong side’ of the road is to wrap your head around the fact that the turn signal and the windshield wiper are on ‘the wrong side’ of the steering wheel as well!
16. I still easily fit in a crib together with a 5-year-old. One of the reasons why niece loves me to put her to bed!
17. You should avoid getting a speeding fine in Switzerland. It’s bloody expensive!
18. But it must be a great place to be at when you’re on a diet. Because eating is almost not affordable either!
19. You’re most probably capable of way more than you give yourself credit for!
20. It’s still very possible you don’t believe it though!
21. When it’s -15°C (5°F) wine freezes when you leave it outside – yes, what a revelation. To my defence, I have never been good at science!
22. Being socially awkward doesn’t decrease with age!
23. The fake it till you make it approach might work short-term but will also increase the feeling of being an imposter!
24. Poached eggs > fried eggs >scrambled eggs > boiled eggs!
25. Don’t pigeonhole yourself! Neither let anybody else!
26. I don’t like people. But I love some individuals! (I heard someone else saying this on a podcast but forgot who it was. I very very much relate!)
27. When you’re in Paris and think you must be close to the Eiffel Tower, you probably aren’t!
28. I am my worst bully and if I am not careful I treat myself like I would never treat anyone else!
29. This is something I very much need to work on!
30. Big waves and bikini tops don’t go well together unless you’re into showing strangers at the beach your pale German boobs!
31. I might not be where I want to be yet but think I am on the right path!
32. I truly am a bird shit magnet!
33. And last but not least: I have learned how to make a gif in photoshop and there is no going back now!