I was thinking about endings a lot last week. In the beginning of the year I said that this was going to be the year of endings. And I was excited about it. I kinda forgot or more likely supressed that I actually despise endings. Even sunsets and falling stars make me sad. I like when things stay the same. I like when I have some kind of stability in my life. Hence I am not a big risk taker. I guess I was excited about the endings that are close now because I knew they would push me to make changes in my life I would probably not have dared otherwise.
Now that things actually come to an end I feel a little less excited and a little more frightened. I feel this delicate pain of letting go. But I guess that’s the aim of the game. There would never be a sunrise if there wasn’t a sunset before.
This week has involved a few events that just showed me the force change is coming with at the moment. After spending the last 3 months busily working on and thinking about my thesis basically 24/7 the free headspace I have now makes me catch up with the reality of the pending change. I am not sure if I like it. Maybe it’s good that I don’t have much choice.
But before I get all mushy and carried away with way too philosophical gibberish let’s do some catching up!